So, Doc... you think this painful rash will clear up by itself? That's a relief! That's not even close to what I told you, Ted. Did you say I need to use ointment on it? No. What I said was that your rash will go away if you switch to boxer shorts until it clears up completely. The only problem is that I'm not really a boxer shorts type of guy. Right. So could you at least switch over to a style of thong without glitter-coated string? Seriously? They make them that way?
Let's go, honey. Our reservations are for seven, and they won't hold the table for us. Just let me go grab my purse... hold on a minute. Ted, you are not wearing that scuba suit to Rusty's. Why not...? It's a seafood restaurant! Because I hate it when you dive into their display tank and pull the rubber bands off the lobsters' claws just to watch them fight. I do it for the kids, dear. Our boys need to witness a few gruesome crustacean death bouts to truly respect the ocean's majesty.
Hi. I'm here about the job you advertised in the newspaper for a nighttime stock boy. I see. So, do you have any prior experience as a retail manager? Umm... no, not really. I'm just here about the stock boy job. Can you manage a staff of twenty to forty people? No. Why are you asking me all these questions that don't have anything to do with the #@!! stock boy job? I just need to make sure you weren't after my job. You have no idea of how close you just came to ending up in the trunk of my Hyundai.
