Damn. The wife kicked me out of the house for awhile. You ever been married, Wally? Yep. Three times. I guess I never knew that. If you don't mind me asking, how come it never worked out? You know how it is... Being married to a chubby, balding man who suffers from chronic stress-triggered incontinence isn't a picnic for any woman. Tell me about it. I left quite a mess back at home. Thank god I still have gorgeous hair.
What's the world comin' to? I got beat up at a funeral yesterday just for keepin' to myself and mindin' my own business. I s'pose when your business happens to be bodysnatchin', you take your chances.
Got this new job workin' for the city parks. I spend the whole day goin' around from place to place, checkin' to see if all them park bathrooms are clean. And the answer is NO. No they ain't.
Looks like I'm home early tonight. What's for dinner, honey-cakes? I just ate leftovers. You told me you were going to *rid the city of crime*, so I didn't think you'd be home. *PFFFT!!* Yeah, right. Turns out it's *a lot* more complicated than I had originally thought. Don't be so hard on yourself, dear. You put a stop to *some* of it, yes? *No*, yuck. Turns out, the criminal underbelly is *rife* with pathogens. *No way* am I going to contract hepatitis in the name of justice.
